LOOK GOOD - FEEL BETTER!

This is what I'll be doing today....going to the Greenwood Hospital for a program they have for women undergoing chemo.  It's a nationwide program and I'm looking forward to it.  You can read all about it at their website.    This basically explains it.  What a wonderful program for women going through cancer.  My hair is all basically gone now, except for a mohawk on the top of my head (LOL).



Group programs are step-by-step makeover learning sessions led by cosmetology professionals using products donated by the cosmetic industry. Each two-hour, hands-on workshop includes a 12-step skin care and makeup lesson, nail care techniques, and professional advice on how to deal with hair loss using wigs, scarves, hats, hairpieces, and other accessories.

Patients at various stages of treatment receive personal attention and take home instruction booklets and complimentary cosmetic kits in shades that match their skin tones. Each year, more than 50,000 individuals participate in small groups of five to 10 that create a sense of support and community.

Group programs are offered nationwide in comprehensive cancer centers, hospitals, local American Cancer Society offices, and other community settings. Find a local group program now (copied from the Look Good, Feel Better website)

I will update you about the program after I've gone.  I also still need to update you about my chemo day last week and the Relay for Life.  I've got pictures to share too.  But, I spent the weekend on the couch or in bed.  I was totally zapped!  I didn't throw up once though.....just slept.  That's why I'm behind on my blogging.

Chemo #2 down....2 more to go!

I'll catch you up to date tonight (if I feel like it),  If not, then I'll be back when I can! 

Until next time....I'm on my way to get beautified!  :=)

Cindy

GOD KNOWS MY NEEDS!

"The LORD will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail." - Isaiah 58:11

I recently signed up for God-Vine and daily verses/devotions/inspiring stories are sent to my email every morning.  I haven't always taken the time to open them right then.  But this morning I was drawn to OPEN IT AND READ IT NOW  (you know that "still small voice")!  And this was the verse in my mailbox this morning and I just can't get over the timeliness with what is going on with my body right now.  I'll explain in more detail later (getting ready to go to the doctor again right now), but I had my 2nd round of chemo yesterday and I was having some problems and it comes down to me not drinking enough liquids.  So, I read this verse this morning about "being like a well-watered garden" and I don't think it's a coincidence that this message came to me today.  God will guide me and satisfy my needs and strengthen my frame....what an awesome promise that I needed right now!  I'm finding He's always "one step ahead of me", knowing my needs before I do.  I will certainly need Him in getting down the equivalent of 16 bottles of water (any liquid) every day.  I can do it...with His help and I cling to His promises! 

I'll give a full report of my chemo appt (yesterday) and my appointment today later tonight if I feel up to it.  Feeling really tired, but get periods of time where I feel better.

Until then....I thank God for His goodness to me and His promises that help make me stronger to fight this cancer.  He has lead me to the right doctors and walks through this journey with me...... I can't do it without Him.  When I'm feeling weak, He holds me up through prayers and encouragement from His people, His promises in His Word, His presence in my life.  I can't thank everyone enough for your continued prayers. 

Cindy

DR. VENKETESH PROMISED ME A VERY BIG HAIRCUT.....

Yes he did!  And tonight was the night.  I gave my daughter, Erin, the honors of cutting my hair while my daughter, Jennifer, got the honors of being the photographer.  I debated on whether I'd post any of these photos on my blog, but knew I wanted them for my "personal album".  But, I've decided to show some of them on my blog, as this is all part of having cancer.  I want to take the "fear" out of cancer for anyone reading my blog and want to be "real" about my journey.  None of us know when or if we'll ever walk this road and if my blog can help anyone finding themselves in this place in the future....then I want it to be "real".  So, pictures you get! 

Even though it appears I had a lot of hair left, this is what I was dealing with all day long.  Actually, I had been dealing with it for 3 days now, but today was the worse, with my hair coming out in fistfuls like this.  It was all over me and I just decided I couldn't stand that any longer.

This is my hair before we began to cut it.  Although it looks like I still have a lot of hair, it is really quite thinner than it began.  I had a LOT of thick hair.

This was the back of my hair....still no bald spots....but you can see how the hair was falling out on my neck.  It would get all over my shirt and everywhere and was so annoying.  Give it another day it was probably going to be balding anyway.

My granddaughter, Jenna, wanted to "help", so she took the first cut.

Then her mommy (Erin) took over.  She had to cut my hair off first before using the hair clippers.  I did not want her to shave my head, as I had to be careful not to be nicked since I'd be prone to infection right now with my white blood cells so low.  So, I just wanted it to be real short so I wouldn't have to deal with the long hair falling out in clumps.  Now I'll just have to deal with the short hair falling out.

And then she styled it for me!  LOL!

  Once she got it cut short enough, then she started with the clippers.  The look on her face in this picture is priceless!  LOL!  I think she was a "little afraid" to do it.

Then she got real comfortable and did a great job!

Ta Da....here it is!  We were trying to decide who I looked like.  My sister Sheila did this last year and we took one look at her and said, "Oh my gosh, you're Dad"!  I'm not kidding....she was totally daddy!  Sheila and I looked alike when were younger but I think over the years I've changed to look like both mom and dad. 

 

And here I am with Larry....you know, they say couples start looking like each other.  LOL!  Well now we have similar haircuts.  Actually, I think HIS is longer than mine now!  He's white/grayer though!

Now, I figure if I have to deal with this anyway, I'm going to have "fun" with it.  I've always wanted an excuse to wear hats!

Well, I picked this hat up the other day so I can use it to sit out and block the sun off of me.  I think while I'm on chemo I'm not suppose to be out in direct sunlight.  So, this is my "sun hat"!  :=)

And here's my terry cloth pink turbin.  This will keep me warmer in air conditioning.  It's actually more of a "sleep turbin".  I'll show you something else I can do with this tomorrow...it cracks me up!  Wait 'til you see!

Now, I'm kinda liking this red "roaring 20's" turbin!  And with all of the "big flowers" being fashionable today, this is a fun look.

Same turbin....just turned the bow/flower to the back.

And here's my wig!  I just threw it on real fast...didn't brush and style it. 

You know, I think I'm ok with this.  My head actually feels great with the hair gone and the soreness is even going away.  It's so much cooler.  I know it will all be gone in a day or two.  This is something I can deal with.  Hair will come back and it's minor to killing this cancer.  So, I'll just have "fun" with the many hats/scarves/turbins I can wear and make the best of it!  So, expect to see more "looks"!  :=)

This chemo is killing my cancer.....I can deal with the side affects of it.  God has not promised that I will not have any "struggles" in life....but He did promise to be by my side through them.  And He's been delivering on His promise!  I couldn't do it without Him!

Until next time....Give thanks to God in everything!

Cindy

THE HAIR HAS TO GO TONIGHT!!!

Ok, my hair has been coming out for a few days now and today has been the worst.  It's getting EVERYWHERE!  When I run my hands through it, it comes out in fistfuls.  Amazingly, even with the amount of hair I've lost, I do not have bald spots yet.  My hair is THICK....I knew that....but. wow, this just proves how thick it is/was!  The one thing that I wasn't prepared for was how sore my scalp has gotten!  It's very, very tender to the touch.

Anyway, like I said, it's getting everywhere!  It's hanging down on my shoulders....is all over my back....and just getting really annoying now.  So, my girls are going to come over tonight to help me go ahead and get rid of it.  I'm ready.  It will grow back...I know that.  It will seem weird, but it's going to be gone anyway and putting it off until tomorrow isn't going to change anything.

I've been doing pretty good...can't complain.  Mainly just get tired sometimes, but not as badly.  So, if I need a nap...I take one.  At least I don't have any little children to try to keep up with.  Speaking of little children, though, my oldest granddaughter, Jenna, spent the night and day with me (she's almost 13) and I've enjoyed having her here.  Then the other two, Abby (9) and Luke (4), came over with their mommy (Jen) and daddy (Joe) to wish me a Happy Mother's Day.  My other daughter, Erin, has been at work, but will be here shortly.  So, it's been a good day. 

This will be a busy week. Tuesday night will be Stamp Class (soooo looking forward to that!).  Chemo on Wednesday (hope-hope), back for a shot on Thursday.  And then Relay for Life on Friday night and Saturday morning.  Then I have a Thirty One party on Saturday night.  I'm hoping to be able to do all of this. 

Not much else new to report....just the hair.  I'll come back with a full report (maybe with pictures...not sure yet).  At least I'm ready with my "cranium prothesis" (wig).  :=)

Remember to pray for my white blood count this week.  I  don't want to have to postpone any of my chemo treatments.  Thanks!

Happy Mothers' Day to everyone!

Cindy

IT'S COMING OUT!!!!

Here it is....only 6:30 AM and I'm up and at 'em!   I'm going to Indianapolis with  my sister, Sheila, today for her genetic testing.   I already got mine done (negative) and she gets her's done today and will get her results in about 2 weeks.  Hoping her's turns out negative too!  And of course we'll have to stop at our favorite stores while we're up there....Flower Factory and Christmas Tree Shop....and eat lunch....we'll just make a day of it!

I've been feeling pretty good!!!!  Just a little tired, but heck, I'm always tired.  LOL!  I have more energy than I did, so I'm hoping that means that my white blood cells are replenishing!

And the hair....well, it's still here!  But, I don't think it will be around much longer.  If I run my hands through my hair I come out with a bunch in my hands.  Quit doing that, right?  LOL!  And I just now brushed it and had it all over me.  Plus, my scalp is tender.  So we'll see how things go.  If it gets bald spots or so thin that I'd look better just getting rid of it...I've got my girls ready to take care of that for me.  Got my wig and turbins just in time!  :=)

It's all good....it will grow back.  And think how much cooler it will be for the summer!  :=)

Nothing else new to report, which is good because that means I'm having no problems and feeling pretty good.  Oh, did I tell you I've lost 10 pounds.  I know, not a good way to lose it (I was planning on using my new treadmill for that, but haven't even been on it since chemo).  I'm always happy to lose some pounds though. 

Until next time....give thanks to God in everything!

Cindy

MY DOCTOR UPDATES TODAY......

Today was my chemo follow-up with Dr. Vankatesh.  It's been 10 days since my first chemo and this visit was to see how my body has handled it.  They had to draw blood through my port, so it was my first time to feel the "poke" that goes into my port....not too bad.  

Leukopenia - a decrease in the total number of white blood cells (WBC), which may lead to low white blood cell count

  My White Blood Cell count is down.  From what he indicated, it isn't just slightly down....he said 1.1, but I'm not real sure what that means.  I don't do chemo again until next Wednesday (May 11), so as long as my white blood cells come back up, I'll be ok for it.  If not, I won't be able to do chemo that day.  So, my prayers are for my white blood cells to be acceptable for chemo next week.  I don't want to have to skip any.  Plus, he said he will give me a shot the day after chemo that will help my white blood cells.  So, I know he's got it under control, and while I wasn't particularly pleased with this news, I know it will be ok.  This happens with chemo and Dr. Vankatesh knows how to handle it.  I totally trust my "team".

I also am taking an antibiotic now...not because I have an infection or anything....but our white blood cells fight infection.  So, I'm taking the antibiotic to head off any infection I may come into contact with.  I need to stay away from sick people and just be careful.  Good thing I'm a "homebody" and don't really like being around crowds.  :=)  I've got a good excuse to make Larry go to Wal mart instead of me...LOL!

The nausea....I threw up 5 times with my last chemo and Dr. Vankatesh said that's too much.  So, he's bringing out the "big guns" for my next chemo, which I highly expect to take care of this.  It will be a different anti-nausea medicine that I will be taking the day of and two days after chemo. 

I really like Dr. Vankatesh and his sense of humor!  He and I get along great....I think he "gets" MY sense of humor...and believe me, he dishes out his own!  LOL!  I told him today that I didn't particularly like that anti-nausea medicine he gave me last time that dissolves on your tongue...gross!  I suggested that he should try these drugs out himself before he gives them to his patients...LOL!  His answer..."If I tried out every chemo, I wouldn't be here"!  :=)  So, I guess that wasn't such a good idea.   I actually wasn't talking about chemo...I was talking about nasty tasting pills that dissolve on your tongue.  LOL!  But, he did say I don't have to take that gross pill anymore....hehe!  Give me a pill I can swallow straight down and I'm fine...I don't want to TASTE IT!!!!

I fully expect to do better with my next chemo.  He's able to see now how my body has reacted to it and knows the adjustments to make for my next one.  Like I said:  my prayer request this time around is that my blood count will be back up and I can get my chemo next Wednesday!

Next was my appointment with my surgeon, Dr. Zusan, for the follow up to my surgery.  All good there!  It's healing fine, no infections, all looks good!  And, as always, Dr. Zusan follows up with a hug.  Her office people are wonderful there (they are at Dr. Vankatesh's too).  I won't need to see Dr. Zusan again until I finish my 4 rounds of chemo....then she will be able to test to see how much my tumor has shrunk and we'll go from there.

Sharon is my Certified Breast health navigator.

Whether you have questions about your mammogram or need support following your breast cancer diagnosis, Community's breast health specialists are here for you as a resource and advocate. Created in 2006, this service focuses on the needs of all breast patients. The breast specialist’s goal is to provide continuity for patients and their families throughout their health care experience during what can be a very stressful time in a woman’s life.

Sharon Bronnenberg, B.S.N., R.N., OCN, CBCN, has been with Community health Network since 1992, working in the specialty areas of bone marrow transplant, ICU and at the Community Regional Cancer Center - North. She joined the breast health program at Community Hospital South in September 2008. Sharon was nominated for Community Health Network’s Nursing Excellence award in 2007 and 2008.  She holds a B.A. in Sociology from Butler University (1972) and a Master Gardener designation from Purdue University (2005).

Sharon is a breast and thyroid cancer survivor. She and her husband, Michael, have been married for over 30 years. They live in a restored farm in Shelby County with their two children and many animals. Sharon's hobbies include gardening, ballroom dancing, reading, Sudoku and collecting antiques.

We spent a lot of time talking with Sharon, who is a breast cancer survivor of 12 years.  She is a huge asset to my team, as she talks with me about any concerns I may have.  She has been a huge help to me about recontruction options.  It is a personal decision and no one will tell you what you should do regarding a lumpectomy or masectomy, but it's good to talk with someone who has "been there".  Although I don't have to make my surgery decision yet, I am trying to learn everything I can so I can make the most informed decision.  I just love Sharon and she's been a great advocate.

Another one we met today was Christina, who shared her own life story of pain.  I firmly believe that God brings people together for a purpose and today I witnessed Him connect two people who needed each other at this moment.  God is so good.  I know He has implanted Christina in my heart and I will be praying for His presence to cover her pain.  When you meet people on your daily walk, remember that you have no idea what they are dealing with and how much they may need your kindness that day.

I have met so many wonderful people on my journey so far, who are enriching my own life.  Everyone at the doctor's offices have been so personable and they really care.  My appointments are "good experiences".  I thank God for bringing these special people into my life.

Until next time.....praying for good white blood cell count!  :=)

Cindy

Oh, one last thing!  I'm up to $80 toward my $200 goal for Relay for Life.  Thanks so much Amy, Jen and Erin for your contributions.  They meant a lot to me!  If anyone wants to donate, you can do so here.  Any contribution is appreciated!  :=)

BEST DAY SINCE CHEMO....

Just a quick update before I head to bed.  Today was a great day!  It's been 9 days since my first chemo and the first day I've felt more "like myself".  While I haven't felt so great the previous days, it could have been worse.  I did have nausea early on, but one of the biggest problems I found myself dealing with was "anxiety attacks" and of course fatigue.  Today I was tired, but just "felt better".  I even went to the movie tonight with my sister, Sheila. 

Tomorrow I have two doctor appointments...one with my chemo doctor and one with my surgeon.  Both of these appointments are follows-ups and I'm glad to get to go and see what they have to say.  With the chemo being the very day after my surgery, I tended to forget that I was also recuperating from surgery.  While I'm sore, I'm pretty sure I'm healing up good. 

My life seems to be consumed with doctor appointments, but I actually look forward to them so they can tell me if we're making progress with killing this nasty cancer. 

My next chemo treatment will be May 11, so hopefully that means I'll have about a week and a half of feeling "normal" before I get hit again.  I won't sugarcoat it....it wasn't much fun.  But, it could have been much worse too.

On another note...I still have hair!  :=)

My sister and I have signed up for the local Relay for Life and will be participating in the "Survivor's Lap" on Friday evening at 6 PM.  I am trying to raise money to support this cause and if you feel lead to donate, please visit my personal page here.  You can also donate by purchasing a Luminary to honor those you may know who are fighting the battle or have fought the battle in the past.  I am really looking forward to participating in this with my sister.  Believe me, research IS making a difference and we are two lives who are benefitting from all of the past donations!

Until next time....thanks be to God for His blessings...
Cindy