THERE IS HELP FOR DEPRESSION!

Depression......what is it?  It's a condition that wants to zap the life out of you!  Many people suffer from it and even though they recognize they do, they don't want to get help for it.  That described me for most of my life.  I have suffered from depression off and on for my whole life.  It's hard to admit to anyone that you are depressed.  I especially found it hard to admit it as a Christian....you know, I'm suppose to have the "joy, joy, joy down in my heart!"  But, the truth is, I have Jesus in my heart, but not always the joy in my heart.



Depression is a serious medical illness that involves the brain. It's more than just a feeling of being "down in the dumps" or "blue" for a few days. If you are one of the more than 20 million people in the United States who have depression, the feelings do not go away. They persist and interfere with your everyday life. Symptoms can include

• Sadness
• Loss of interest or pleasure in activities you used to enjoy
• Change in weight
• Difficulty sleeping or oversleeping
• Energy loss
• Feelings of worthlessness
• Thoughts of death or suicide

Depression is a disorder of the brain. There are a variety of causes, including genetic, environmental, psychological, and biochemical factors. Depression usually starts between the ages of 15 and 30, and is much more common in women. Women can also get postpartum depression after the birth of a baby. Some people get seasonal affective disorder in the winter. Depression is one part of bipolar disorder.
There are effective treatments for depression, including antidepressants and talk therapy. Most people do best by using both.
http://www.bing.com/health/article/medlineplus-MPdepression/Depression?q=depression&qpvt=depression

Like I said, I feel I have always fought with depression.  I can remember being depressed and feeling worthless as a teenager.  But, it has taken me until the ripe age of 58 to admit it to a doctor and ask for help.   I have managed to "cover it up" with smiles in the past.  But, now I am finally learning to "deal with it" rather than "cover it up."

After my mom died in February of 2010, my siblings didn't stick together as would have been expected and I spiraled into a very deep depression.  I am not wanting to talk about that, but just give you the history of when I realized I could no longer function without help.  It was December 2010 that I finally reached out to my doctor at my annual check-up, telling him that I wouldn't do anything to myself, but I didn't care if I lived or died.  This was before I was diagnosed with breast cancer.  It was the first time in my life that I asked a doctor for something to help me fight it....  the first time in my life that I was willing to ask for an antidepressant.  I am so NOT a pill popper, so he knew if I was asking for something, then I surely needed it.  He put me on a low dosage of Zoloft and for the next year and all through cancer, it seemed to do the trick.

But, now, after winning my battle with cancer, I found myself back into that same "hole"....no desire for the things I love, no energy, wanting to sleep all day, feeling worthless and unloved.  It was back.

Two weeks ago I had my six month check-up with my oncologist.  First was the bloodwork, which all turned out great!  Physically things are good and there is still no evidence of cancer.  Yay!  My oncologist was not in the office, so I met with his nurse practitioner and I discussed my feelings of depression and tiredness with her.  She reassured me that it was perfectly normal and reminded me of all that my body had been through, plus the emotional aspects of having cancer (added on top of the family situation).  She did say it sounded like I was dealing with depression and I was on a small dosage of Zoloft and she made a suggestion of a different anti-depressant, which will also help with the hot flashes I have that are caused by the Arimidex I take to fight a reoccurence.  It was good to talk with her about this and to get the reassurance I needed.  And I no longer fight against medications.  She put me on the other antidepressant....that was 2 weeks ago.  I have read the side affects online and they can be scary to read, but I recognize that everything has side affects and it does not mean that I will necessarily have them.  I also read that it takes up to 30 days for it to be affective in your body, so I'm not "quite there" yet, but I am beginning to feel the cloud lifting.

One thing that cancer has taught me....get help when you need it.  So many times in the past I have just suffered through things (even physical things), rather than ask for help with them.  I am now learning that I don't need to do that...I owe myself a better quality of life and if it takes a "pill" to help me, it doesn't make me less of a Christian. 

My purpose in sharing my "dark secret" is to try to help others who may be suffering in silence.  I've had to learn that there is no shame in being depressed.   It very well may be a chemical inbalance in your brain....a lack of serotonin.  Just like a physical ailment, there is no shame in seeking help for an emotional or mental ailment.  It doesn't mean you're crazy!

There are many researchers who believe that an imbalance in serotonin levels may influence mood in a way that leads to depression. Possible problems include low brain cell production of serotonin, a lack of receptor sites able to receive the serotonin that is made, inability of serotonin to reach the receptor sites, or a shortage in tryptophan, the chemical from which serotonin is made. If any of these biochemical glitches occur, researchers believe it can lead to depression, as well as obsessive-compulsive disorder, anxiety, panic, and even excess anger.
http://www.webmd.com/depression/features/serotonin

Until next time, I hope I have helped even ONE person who may be like me...suffering in silence.   We don't need to do that.  We deserve a better quality of life, so don't be afraid to talk with your doctor about it.  I'm glad I did!

Cindy

I WILL TRUST IN HIM WITH ALL MY HEART...

Isaiah 40:28-31

And I will soar

On wings like eagles

Held by the hand of God

I will run and not grow tired

When on His name I call

For the Lord is never weary

His ways are beyond my thoughts

I will trust in Him

With all my heart



Isn't this just beautiful!  The minute I heard it, I knew I had to share it with all of you!  A friend of mine had shared it on facebook.  It spoke to both of us and I feel there is someone else out there who may need to hear this and trust in Him with all their heart.  May God bless you as you listen to this song.

Until next time, always remember that no matter what you are going through God is with you........

Cindy

JACKSON COUNTY RELAY FOR LIFE SURVIVOR DINNER

Well, I woke up early this morning....way too early!  So, since I can't go back to sleep, I might as well update you on the Survivor Dinner I went to to last night. 

This weekend is both the Jackson County and the Jennings County Relay for Life and I plan to participate in both.  Jackson County had their Survivor Dinner last night.  This is the first Relay Survivor Dinner I have ever attended.  I missed them last year when I was going through my treatment.

My sister and I were both able to  attend, which was nice.   I couldn't help thinking I wish our mom would have survived and been there with us.

Sheila's husband, Denver, was able to attend with us too.  Unfortunately, Larry had to work over, so he wasn't able to be there.

It was a nice event and good to see so many survivors.  We had dinner, had some speakers, and they had each of us to stand to represent how many years we had survived.  That was interesting.  There was a lady there that has actually survived cancer for 44 years. 

After dinner, Sheila got with some friends she works with and I snapped their pictures.

She was actually happy that my camera goes everywhere....lol!

And then we posed with our survivor t-shirts we all received.

It was great to be honored for surviving...but I couldn't help but think of my mom and dad who didn't survive, as well as others.  But, I know they would both be happy for us.

Before we left, there were t-shirts to sign for the sponsors.  All survivors signed these for them.  I thought that was kinda neat.

Yikes!  When I bent down I had a little cleavage showing....very little...lol!  Well, it just goes to show that you can still have cleavage after reconstruction.  I never would have even attempted to wear such a dress with my droopy D's...lol!

I thought this was a neat idea.....and I'm all over neat ideas...lol!

It was a great night honoring survivors and now we are looking forward to the Relay this weekend.  We will attend the Jackson County Relay on Friday night and then will be at the Jennings County Relay all day Saturday.  We are hoping for good weather!

Until next time...celebrate whatever it is that you are surviving!  We are all survivors of something, as I know we all have things dealt to us in life that tests our strength and courage and faith. 

Be thankful for whatever God has brought you through.

Cindy

LIFE AFTER CANCER...HAS IT'S CHALLENGES!

My last post was about "Life after cancer being good" and it is!  I feel great in most ways!  But I am also finding life after cancer to be challenging. 

I am very fatigued.....sometimes depressed.....day after day.  I can't even get motivated to do the things I NEED to do and the things I normally LOVE to do! 

My pictures I post on my blog are pictures of me "living out loud", but I must confess that I am not "living out loud" every day. 

My daily life consists of...sleeping until noon and some days not even wanting to get up then.  Some days I think I could just stay in bed all day.  But, I eventually force myself up.  Get my bath, eat dinner, and then sit. 

And sit, and sit, and sit....THINKING of the things I need to do but not getting up to do them!  No energy...no motivation.....even though the desire is there.

I don't take pictures of my daily life.  How interesting would that be to see picture after picture of me sitting on the couch?  Or sleeping?  lol

The problem with that is that people see a lop-sided view of my life.  The fun "living out loud" pictures make it appear that my daily life is like that...when that is the furthest thing from the truth.  Because of that, I feel like others think I'm always making "excuses".  It makes me feel guilty.

But how can I blame anyone?  I have presented that picture to the world.  In my efforts to show others that they can survive cancer, I have made it seem like it's just a small bump in the road.

The fact is, like many other conditions people suffer from, the fatigue I deal with is not visible.  The depression is not visible.  It's usually something I keep to myself. 

I honestly FEEL GOOD!  No pain, no achiness to speak of, no headaches, nothing but fatigue and depression to bring me down.  I'm left wondering why. 

Is it the Arimidex that I take to keep away a cancer reoccurence?  While it cuts my chances of reoccurence in half, it is not without side affects.  I have to take this for at least 5 years....in a few months I will have one year down.  And, honestly, I can't complain too much about the side affects.  There are many women who find they cannot take this pill at all because of the pain!  I do not suffer the pain it can cause.  Hot flashes...oh yes!  Weakness and fatgue...yes!  Mood disturbances....yes!  Insomnia...sometimes!  Weight gain....maybe.  :=(  But, look at all of those side affects!  I feel fortunate that this is all I am dealing with and that I can actually take this pill!

In these studies, the most common Arimidex side effects included:

• Hot flashes -- in up to 36 percent of people
• Nausea -- up to 20 percent
• Weakness or fatigue -- up to 19 percent
• Mood disturbances -- up to 19 percent 
• Headaches -- up to 18 percent
• Arthritis -- up to 17 percent
• Pain -- up to 17 percent
• Joint pain -- up to 15 percent
• Sore throat -- up to 14 percent
• Nausea and vomiting -- up to 13 percent 
• Bone pain -- up to 12 percent.

Other common side effects of Arimidex (occurring in 8 to 11 percent of people) included:

• Back pain
• Cough
• Difficulty breathing
• Osteoporosis
• Accidental injury
• Broken bones
• Insomnia (see Arimidex and Insomnia)
• Swelling or water retention in the arms or legs
• Abdominal pain (stomach pain)
• Constipation
• Diarrhea
• High cholesterol (see Arimidex and High Cholesterol)
• Infections
• Weight gain (see Arimidex and Weight Gain)
• Breast pain
• Dizziness
• Urinary tract infection (bladder infection or UTI)
• Loss of appetite.

I can't say for sure this is why I'm experiencing this, but considering this falls in the category of "side affects", I figure it is a big possibility of why I feel the way I do.

I also have to consider what my body has been through.....in the past two years, I have had six surgeries, two being pretty major ones.  It hasn't even been a year yet since I was done with chemo and have my bilateral masectomy.  My last surgery was just in December.   And I have continued with procedures in 2012.  That's not counting the emotional turmoil I have experienced in the last two years.

So, when I think about this.....I'm wondering if this is all normal.  In spite of feeling good, I seem to be having a hard time bouncing back into my life as it was before cancer.  I have spoken with a couple of other cancer survivors who told me they struggled with these same things after beating cancer.  I guess that makes me feel a little more "normal". 

In some areas of my life, I feel better than I did BEFORE my cancer diagnosis!  My breathing is better, my sleep is better, my leg pain is better, and I overall feel better!!!!

So, today, I made a conscious decision to FIGHT BACK!!!  The cancer didn't take my physical life and I am NOT going to let it take my quality of life away either!

I literally made myself go for a long walk today....I plan to take the car out and figure out how far I walked today!  I think walking is so therapeutic, in more ways than one!

When walking, I see things I don't see when I'm driving.  I think a lot.  I appreciate the journey with God.  And it gets my blood pumping and the sun gives me Vitamin D.  It's just good for me in so many ways and I am proud of myself for making myself get off of this couch and DO IT!!!!

One big thing I noticed when I walked today was my breathing.  It was great!!!  Before my cancer I had found that I couldn't even take a deep breathe.  And just walking a short distance or up some stairs would leave me breathless.  Not today!!!  Today I was able to take in deep breathes all through my walk and when my walk ended, I was not very winded at all.  This is BIG for me!!!  Having cancer caused me to lose weight.....losing weight caused me to get rid of my sleep apnea....and that has resulted in better breathing!

The only pain I felt while walking was my left knee, which really came as no surprise to me.  It is the knee that has bothered me for years (no cartilege left).  But even it didn't hurt until I was halfway through my walk.  Just a few months ago, I couldn't have ever walked this far because of the pain in my buttocks and legs....that was before my injections!

So, in spite of everything, I find myself feeling very thankful.   This post isn't about complaining.  It is just keeping things "real" and it gives me the chance to explain to my family and friends that while I'm doing good...I still have some challenges.

My six month visit with my oncologist is coming up Thursday.  I will be discussing this with him and see if he has any suggestions.  I hope he does bloodwork so we can rule anything else out. 

Right now, though, I am going to go get ready to go to our local Relay for Life Survivor Dinner!  And, I do have to say, that walk did me a world of good.....I feel better!  I will just have to make this a daily part of my life.  I tried it on the treadmill during the winter, but found it hard to even get to a mile....because it was BORING!!!!  I love walking outside...much more interesting!

Until next time, remember that not all things people are suffering are visable to us.  I know this experience has made me more empathetic toward others.  Go for a walk....it's good for you in more ways than one!  And be thankful...always....things can always be worse.

Cindy

LIFE IS GOOD...there IS life after cancer!

My life is good!  Yes, there IS life after cancer!  If you or anyone you know ever gets diagnosed (and I hope NOT), always remember that!  I want my life to be a testimony to others that there IS "life after cancer"!

Last year at this time I was doing chemo.  Wow, what a difference a year makes!  I'm still doing really well and will have my six month check up with my oncologist next week.  I always look forward to those appointments, rather than dreading them.....because it makes me feel like I'm DOING something to keep myself healthy!  There's always that chance of reoccurence and I want to give myself the best chance possible in that case...by catching it early!  And of course if I walk away from that doctor appointment with nothing but GOOD NEWS and NED (no evidence of disease) then that will make my day!!!!

I feel pretty good most of the time, but I am beginning to want to sleep all day.  What is up with that?  Physically I feel fine.  But, I have very little energy when I'm just around the house.  I just want to lie around all day.  I do better if I keep busy and am out and about!  I'm thinking it could be the arimidex I am on to fight the cancer reoccuring, as one of the side affects of it is "weakness and fatigue".  Another common side affect is "weight gain"!  Ugh..and yes, I've gained a bit back. which makes me sad.  But, I'm still able to wear my 14's and 16's, so it's not bad yet.  I will be real sad if I go back to a 20!  For now I'll blame that "little pill", but hope it doesn't keep adding on the pounds. But, if I can't blame the "little pill", then I have to blame myself....lol!

RELAY FOR LIFE

This weekend will be our RELAY FOR LIFE and am so proud of our team, LIVING OUT LOUD....Rhonda, Sheila, Kim, Sarah, Erin, Jenna, Jennifer, Linda, and of course me.  We have raised over $1600 at this point and are still going strong with our flockings but are about to end them soon.  We still want to hit $2000!  Most of our funds have been made with these little pink birds....isn't that awesome?

We will be set up all day at the Jennings County Relay for Life on Saturday, so come see us!  We will have 10 flavors of popcorn to sell!  You need to try them....pickle, banana split, cotton candy.... come see us!  There will be all kinds of activities all day long and it will be a good time for all!  And, for such a great cause!  All of the funds raised go to the American Cancer Society!  I'm excited to go this year as a TEAM!  We attended this Relay last year and had a great time and were so warmly welcomed!  I was bald at the time and now I go back with a full head of hair! 

I live in Jackson County and some of you from Jackson County and reading this may be wondering why I have a team in Jennings County.  No particular reason....other than they asked me to!  They were very supportive of me and my sister last year and we were their guest speakers at their January kick-off breakfast, so when they asked us to have a team this year, it just seemed like the thing to do!  We also plan to participate in the Jackson County Relay, but not as a team this year.  We are contemplating switching the county we set up at each year.  The way I look at it....the money all goes to the same place and for the same cause....TO FIGHT CANCER!!!!!!  I'm just so excited to be able to "give back"! 

One way I can "give back" is through my Thirty-One business.  So, if you would like to help me out in my efforts to collect money for fighting cancer, visit my website www.mythirtyone.com/bags4you and I will give my 25% commission to the American Cancer Society.  Just click on "Place an Order" at the top and find the "Relay For Life" link to place your order.  Let me know if you have any questions, ok? 

Please continue to pray for my friend, Andee, as she continues to fight her ovarian cancer. 

Let's see....what else has been going on in my life since the last time I updated my blog?  Oh yeah, we had another Red Hatter event!  We had such fun and I have started a new blog for our group, so you can visit there for all of the details and pictures of our outings.  We have such a good time everytime we go!

We went for lunch at Zaharakos in Columbus, Indiana.  What a neat place! 

And then we went to Not Just Popcorn in Edinburgh, Indiana!  They have over 300 flavors of popcorn....can you imagine?  We got to sample some of it and of course, we just had to buy some!

For the "rest of the story" (as Andy Rooney would say) and to keep up with our adventures, be sure to visit our new blog at 

http://sisterhoodofthetravellinghatters.blogspot.com/  Bookmark it or even sign up for email updates!  We are having the time of our lives and seeing things close to home that we've never seen!  It's amazing what is "right out your back door"!

LET THE SUMMER FUN BEGIN!

As sad as it made me, I had to bail out on the Dirty Girl Mud Run.  But, I had some friends who went and shared pictures and I know I missed a great time! 

But, I needed to stay home because my brother was coming over to put a new liner in our pool!  We've been trying to get that done for a month and it rained every Saturday......so, when he called me Friday night to say it looked like a good day to do it, I knew I needed to stay home on Saturday so we could get that done.  Hopefully, I'll get to do the Dirty Girl Mud Run NEXT YEAR with my friends!

We knew last year our pool was on it's "last leg" and were just hoping to get last summer out of it...we did.  But, before we even got it properly closed up for the year, most all of the water leaked out of it, so we just let it go all winter and this is what we had waiting on us this Spring.....

Ewwwwww.....I can hear you saying that...lol!  Go ahead....EWWWWWWW!

First we had to get that ewwwy water out of there so we could remove the old, brittle liner.  This is where brothers come in handy (love you Ran!)...LOL! 

Once that was done, we (they....why do I say we?  lol...all I really did was take the pictures!) were able to put in the NEW liner!!!!  Now, none of us (family wise) had ever done this before, but my brother was smart enough to bring along a friend of his who HAD done it at least once before.  LOL...smart brother!  We were all willing to try this, especially when we found out the pool shop would charge $650 to do it....ouch!

It was a "family affair"....The family was willing to help....because they get to go swimming in it every year...lol!

Sheila pitched in by holding the clothes pins needed to hold the new liner up temporarily!

And now all we needed to do was fill it up (it took all night) and then cut the holes for the return and skimmer..... 

TA-DA!!!!
Great job guys and just as soon as that water warms up....

....we'll have a wet and crazy fun summer!!!!!!

Can I talk about ta-tas for just a second?
After all, that IS what this blog is about, right?  LOL!  I just thought I'd update you all on "them".  I went a few weeks ago to get my tattoos (areolas).  I call them my "oreos" because I have a hard time pronouncing areolas.  lol!  Anyway, after getting the tattoos, they are looking more "real" and I am more satisfied with them.  There are still some things I'm not pleased with...in particular, feeling a little lop-sided.  I mentioned this to the nurse who was tattooing me and works with my plastic surgeon....also named Cindy...and she said she thinks my left one settled too much under my arm...and that is why it makes the other one higher and larger looking.  I asked if there is any way to "fix" that and she said YES.  Yay!!!  She said he (the doctor) could make a sling out of Alloderm.  Of course I just HAD to ask what it was and she said, "oh, it is cadaver skin".  To which I said, "Ewwww, you mean skin from a dead human body?".  Sometimes you might be better off to let them use their "fancy terminology and not ask what it actually is...lol.  She said "yes, you already have some in you".  LOL...Uh, ok, if I already have some, why not have some more!  :=)

So, since I have another check up with the plastic surgeon, I will be discussing this with him.  It would be another surgery, but I'd make it "right" now than have to "revisit" it later.

Other than that and a few other revisions, I think I'm feeling better about "them"!  :=)  Gotta feel good about your ta-tas, right?....even if they are fake!

MOTHER'S DAY 2012

I thought of my mom a lot on this Mother's Day.  We lost her on Feb. 10, 2010.  It's hard to beleive she has been gone 2 years already and even harder to see how much has happened and changed since she left us.  This is me and my mom a year or two before she passed away.  My youngest daughter is in the back, so it's "3 generations"!  I thought of mom all day today and so wished I still had her here with me and I could talk to her.  Losing your parents is so hard.  They are such a huge part of your life....they knew you even before your kids did!  I found myself thinking back at the time I lived at home with my parents and they were raising us.  I have such good memories growing up and I have them to thank for that.  So, thank you Mom for being the mom that you were...for sacrificing so much for us and for always loving us.  I miss you greatly and know you could make some things all better.

Mom's Peonys.....remember me showing you Mom's peonys in another post?  Well, they bloomed...aren't they beautiful?  And they smell heavenly!  Thank you Mom...I love you!

I had a great Mother's Day.  Unfortunately, my younger daughter, Erin, had to work today, but she came by to see me last night and brought me a pot of beautiful Gerber Daisies!  My grandchildren, Abby and Luke, also stopped by Friday and brought me some beautiful roses! 

And my grandchildren, Abby and Luke, brought me these beautiful roses.  They came with kisses and hugs too!  :=)

Then today, Jennifer called and wanted to take me out to dinner (along with her hubby, Joe, and Abby and Luke).  I was able to get Jen to pose for a picture with me after lunch.  Wish Erin could have been in it with us.  My hair was a little "flippy" today....lol...I think it's getting time to cut it.  The chemo curls are getting out of control. 

My grandkids....
Oh, how I love my grandkids!  I don't talk enough about them or brag enough about them....so, allow me to brag just a little right now. 

JENNA
Our oldest, Jenna, is 13....will be 14 in July.  Wow, it's still hard to believe I have a grandchild turning into a young woman already!

My sweet, beautiful Jenna....  Jenna was our first-born grandchild....she made me a grandma!  I remember the joy of having a baby in the family again.  She and her mommy lived with us when she was first born and I remember being "scared"...lol.  Hey, it had been many years since I had to care for a baby and even though Erin did the bulk of caring for her, I knew just by the nature of living with us, I needed a refresher course.  It's amazing, though, how fast you learn it all again!  I babysat Jenna while her mommy worked, so we spent many days together when she was growing up.  Now as a teenager, I don't see her as much.

She just finished up her first year as a cheerleader (7th grade)....

....and is now in track as a Discus Thrower and is doing quite well!

And this past week she sang a solo in her school choir concert.  Jenna always loved to sing on stage since a very young age...and quite good, I might add.  I remember her getting up on stage at a talent show at a festival and singing at the age of 5.  So, it comes as no surprise to me that we now find her singing on the stage as a soloist in her school choir.  She just always seemed to love to perform....I would be petrified singing in front of a crowd.  Of course I can't carry a tune....lol! 

Jenna....our teenager.  We are so proud of our Jenna!

ABBY

Abby.....our little dancer....

Abby, our piano player....

Abby, our little rocker....

Abby loves to sing in her school choir too!

Abby, our sweet little Abby!  She is our second born grandchild...she is now 9 years old!  Her dream for her future is to be a veterinarian.  I can believe she will be just that one day, as she loves all animals!!!!  She brings so much joy into our lives with her gusto for life and her sweet inner spirit.  She is not "9 going on 16" and I love that about her!  Her parents have done a good job to let her be "a little girl".  The teens will come soon enough!

LUKE

And then there is Luke....our last grandchild...possibly our very last grandchild (we can hope for an "accident", can't we?)...and our only boy!  Now, let me explain something.  I had two girls....then my two girls each had a girl...and then along comes Luke!  Our "family joke" was that we had no idea what to do with a boy.  lol!  But, we all fell in love with him and quickly learned what to do with him!

Luke, our "little boy" of the family.....bugs and all...lol!

Luke, our little fisherman.....

Luke, our little baseball player....

....and our basketball player

And, Luke, our little drumer.  Luke has taught us that there is a definate difference in "boys and girls" (besides the obvious...LOL).  He has endeared himself into our hearts.  He is a "thinker" and loves learning.  He is also very energetic and a typical boy who likes to rowdy.  He has a sweet, tender side and just makes you smile by being "Luke".

Abby and Luke are siblings...brother and sister...and I love to see them interact with each other.  I think they will always be close.

As you see, I have so much to be thankful for....so much to live for!
My grandchildren give me so many reasons to beat cancer!  I reflect on the people I have in my life....my family, my friends...and realize how truly blessed I am!  I thank God for each one of them.  He has chosen the people in my life and I realize how He is blessing me with each one...my red hatter friends, my fellow cancer survivors and fighters, my family, new friends, old friends....they all make up my reasons for living!  And, they all help me fight against the depression I sometimes have to deal with.  As I focus on these blessings God has placed in my life, I believe my depression will lessen as time goes on...it already has.

I need to start making it a point to post at least once a week so that I don't talk your ear off once I DO blog!  My daughter says I go for weeks with nothing new on my blog and then....BAM...lol!   If you hung through all of this, thanks!  If I'm the only one who reads it, it's still worth it because it's just so "therapeutic" for me!  :=)

Until next time.....put your faith in God.  He will bless us in all parts of our lives....sometimes we just need to recognize His blessings and give thanks for them.  Until next time...make it a point to LIVE OUT LOUD and don't take any day or person for granted!
Cindy