But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up with wings as Eagles; they shall run and not be weary; and they shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31

Monday, May 30, 2011


Well, what do you think of my new hat?  It has a large bill on it, so it can shade my face from the sun, as well as protect my head from the sun.  Plus, when I remove it, it makes a great fan!  LOL!  I have always loved hats but just never wore them...so it's fun to wear them now! 

Notice the flowers (also in the background behind me).  Aren't they pretty!  My sisters, Sheila and Pam, bought them for me....how sweet of them!

A New Lump and a Scare!
Ok, a little update.  A week ago I called my doctor at the Breast Center because I discovered a rather large, hard lump in my diseased breast.  Since we are doing chemo first, the tumor is suppose to be shrinking.  We had never felt a lump at all......me or my doctors....and the tumor was found by the mammogram.  So, to now feel a large lump was unnerving and my first thought was that the chemo wasn't working and it was growing instead of shrinking  So, I called the doctor and she had me to come in to be checked.  I could tell she didn't think it was going to be anything too concerning....until she examined me.  She immediately ordered a mammogram and ultra sound and I could tell she was truly concerned.  The thing is.....it wasn't the tumor they are treating....this was a NEW LUMP!  After the mammogram and ultrasound they determined what is isn't....but couldn't say for sure what it was.  It ISN'T cancer!  They also said it would be highly unlikely to develop a new cancer while on chemo. It did not have the characteristics of cancer.  They suspected it was some kind of hemo-something (lol...fancy word here that I can't remember) or some fat thing (another fancy word I can't remember).  But, basically nothing to worry about and it should begin to get smaller.  My mammogram totally showed a difference from my mammogram in February!  I told her I'm "over" these ta-tas!  LOL!

I am doing ok!
Some of you have contacted me concerned because I had a period of time not updating my blog.  I want to let you know I'm ok.  May was a rough month.....probably rougher than I had thought it would be.  I seem to only get about 10 days the whole month that I feel "decent" and even then I'm weak and tired.  So, I get behind on everything, even updating my blog.  But, I'm doing ok....for a few more days.  I get hit with the chemo again this Wednesday (June 1) and have learned that I won't feel so good for the first week....then I start turning around and each day will get a little better.  It's frustrating, but it is my life right now.  Now, I do want to let you know I'm not sick and throwing up.  But, for the first week I'm lying around sleeping a lot and not eating much and even though I'm not throwing up, I still feel nauseas....I think I'd feel better if I did throw up!  But, it's better for me not to throw up.  And it's hard to drink anything at first, as well as eat, because everything tastes like METAL!  Yuck!  Even when I get to feeling better and beginning to eat more, things don't taste "right".  I can't handle carbonated drinks, so I haven't drank any soda pop for two months now!  That's a biggie for me!!!  My drink of choice is Apple Juice!  It seems to be the one thing that tastes the best....who would have ever guessed that Apple Juice would have become my "friend".  I also find that I can feel soooo hungry and get something to eat....and am done after only a few bites.  I've already had some weight loss, but I had plenty to spare!  All in all, I'm doing good and I know this shall pass.  I'm not complaining, but want to be "real" with you. It's not been easy, but could be much worse and I know I can do this....it just has changed my life this summer.  I have had different people step up to the plate and help me out.  My daughters have helped me with some meals, friends and family have gone with me to appointments, and many have supported me with their prayers, and  I have received cards in the mail that have been very encouraging.  This has been a humbling experience and God is teaching me a lot through it and showering me with love.  I know at the end of all of this I will be fine and I will also be a different person.  And I hope to be able to help others who may find themselves going through this journey.  I am open to wherever God leads me.

Relay for Life - Jennings County

My sister, Sheila, and I attended the Jennings County Relay for Life....it was my 10th day after chemo.  It was good to get out of the house, as I had pretty much stayed there after my chemo.  We had a wonderful time and met such wonderful people at the Relay!  One special person we met was Ralph Cooley.  We had fun with Ralph and even loaned him some "fu fu" to wear for a picture with us.  We learned that Ralph's wife had recently lost her 11 year battle with cancer....please lift him up in prayer.

Now when Ralph removed his hat he had a bald head just like me!  But, I still have hair hanging on (go figure), so I told him I had more hair than him and we did a comparison shot.  LOL!  I debated on whether to show my "bald head" or not, but honestly....it doesn't bother me.  It will grow back!  I have to admit, I wondered what I'd look like bald....not as bad as I anticipated.  LOL!  Very interesting...!  The first thing Sheila said when she saw me bald was that my head was "small"!  I didn't look as much like daddy as she did....I think I resemble both my mom and dad.  And I have to admit, in this 90 degree weather it feels wonderful to go bald!  LOL!

So, here I am with my new friend, Ralph.....showing off our bald heads!  Don't you just love his "fu fu"!

See....I have more hair than him!  Wierd how that hair on top just won't give up!  Go figure!  I'm beginning to think it won't ever fall out!  And I don't want to shave too closely, as I don't want to take the chance of knicking my head since I'd be more susceptible to infection now.

We met so many wonderful people at the Relay!  We hope to be able to be more involved next year.  This year I was weak and had to rest on the way around the track, but we made it all the way around for our survivor lap.  I will feel better next year and be able to participate in more!  It was a wonderful Relay!

My brother, Randy, and his wife, Tina (thanks for taking the pic Tina), live in Jennings County and came over to join us at the Relay.  Sheila and I was happy to see them and thank them  for coming.  We all had a "special time" together.  We lost our mother last year (our father passed away 9 years ago), and we've grown closer and realize how much we need each other.  It meant a lot to both of us that they came over to support us that day.

At the Jackson County Relay I showed you a tanker truck from Farm Bureau.  Someone asked me what was in the tank....I have no idea!  LOL!  I wanted to show you this ambulance they had at the Jennings County Relay.  Pretty cool, huh?

When we got back to Seymour, my sister Pam was in town visiting from Haubstadt, IN (down by Evansville), so we all got together and went out to eat.  It was good to see her....it had been too long.
Before she went back home we went to get some flowers and had this picture taken.  This is all of my sisters....add my brother in...yep, there are 6 of us!
Pauline, Pam, Sheila, Me, Kim

Pam's grandchild, Chole, picked me out a flower.  Isn't it beautiful!  Thanks Pam and Sheila for getting me the flowers!

Chloe has beautiful curly hair and I told her I want my hair to come back just like her's!  :=)

And this is my granddaughter, Jenna.  Yes, I know...I don't look old enough to have a grandchild that old, right?  LOL!  She will be 13 his summer...yikes!  Hard for me to believe too!

She was surrounded by flowers on the way home!  It was a good day with family and I hope you are enjoying my photos.

Until next time....a big shout out to Tina for getting her mammogram!  Who's next?  :=)

No comments:

Post a Comment